“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” – Steven Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Too often, we use questions as weapons. We use questions to dominate others, demonstrate our “superior” mastery, advance our own agenda. No wonder asking questions, and being asked questions, has become so emotionally charged. What if we […]
Listening
Listening deeply to another is the best gift I can think to give this year. Being able to hold space for another. Listening with no agenda. Listening without aiming to respond, or be clever, or win the conversation. Many of us aren’t taught to do this. Our educational system seems to reinforce “listening to win.” […]
How to Mitigate the Dance of Blind Reflex
Barry Oshry started running the Power Lab back in the 1970s. Using anthropological observation techniques, he identified the system that we find ourselves operating within – and how it becomes dysfunctional. Tops (End) – Burdened by overwhelming complexity and responsibility. They feel unsupported, isolated and out of touch. Conflicts in this area become personalized and […]
The Relative Importance of Stakeholders – Using Cats
This gem from 2009 provides one of the best descriptions of stakeholders (and the perils of paying attention to the ones closest to you) I’ve seen. It’s only 3 minutes. Remember: Your project needs to ultimately satisfy the cat. (Thanks to Brandon Carson for sharing this video.)
An Example of Legacy Challenges
Breezewood, Pennsylvania, to me, is a classic example of what happens when too many stakeholders are too wedded to the status quo at the expense of the greater good. The New York Times recently published an article summarizing the history of the Breezewood interchange and the challenges around connecting I-70 / I-76. My suspicion is […]
#52books Getting to Yes with Yourself
#52Books Getting to Yes with Yourself: How to Get What You Truly Want Format: Kindle This is the book where William Ury, master negotiator, admits that it all starts from within you. So much material on negotiation starts with how to manipulate others into doing your bidding. Ury, in Getting to Yes with Yourself, flips […]
#52books How to Change the World
—————– #52 Books – How to Change the World: Change Management 3.0 Format: Softcover Booklet Jurgen Appelo has taken 4 common models and combined them into what he calls a “supermodel.” Dance with the System – PDCA or Plan, Do, Check, Act Mind the People – AKDAR or Ability, Knowledge, Desire, Awareness, and Reinforcement Stimulate […]
The Window of Tolerance
The concept of Window of Tolerance is a useful one to help us understand why we feel so stressed in today’s working environments. The original theory comes from Childhood Development. I’ve observed the same behaviors in adults as well. Also, many of the same solutions. Are the environments you are creating around yourself safe or […]
#52books Coaching for Performance
#52Books – Coaching for Performance Fifth Edition: The Principles and Practice of Coaching and Leadership UPDATED 25TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION (Amazon Affiliate Link) Format: Softcover ————————— My primary skill-building goal for the year – get better at coaching. Any problems I’ve had on projects have, at their core, been people issues. It is to be expected. […]
#52books The Phoenix Project
View on Instagram http://ift.tt/2EW7Rsk ——— #52books – The Phoenix Project: A Novel about IT, DevOps, and Helping Your Business Win Format: Kindle It’s a luxury to sit and consume a book in one sitting. Having the time to do that is half of it. Finding a book you can’t put down is the other. Gene […]
